Travel and culture

Teamlead from hell? I can relate but very differently

Hi Horus,

So I read the post about the person that complained about their team lead. Honestly team leads can be very annoying. My own team lead is sexually harassing me. I am tired. I don’t know how else to tell her that I am not into her.

Before you start raising brows and saying I should go for it, you should know that I am also a lady. I am not into women. I am not spaghetti. I am not bending anywhere so please don’t even bother. Keep your exploring ideas far.

When I started this job, she was always so nice to me. I really liked her. I wanted to learn from her. My other team members were even jealous at a point. If she is going to get lunch, she would get for me. Sometimes she just randomly buys me gifts, like perfume or purse or clothes. She will say “I was at Balogun and I saw this and thought you would like it”. Honestly, I thought nothing of it. I felt she just liked me. She keeps saying she has always wanted a baby sister. She happens to be the only girl among 3 boys. I just felt that was the reason she was so nice

One time she invited me to her place. She said she would really like us to hang out outside the office. That we should have a small girl’s time. When I got to her place, there was someone else there. My team-lead was cooking. Her friend and I got chatty. When she came out of the kitchen, she looked mad. She then asked me to follow her to the kitchen. I went along. I even felt somehow the way she said it but I still thought it was “big sis vibes”. I think she asked her friend to leave because when I went back out, the lady had gone and she didn’t even say bye

In the kitchen, aunty kept using hand to brush my ass and all. Oh, she was practically naked. I saw nothing to it. In my house, I like to get comfortable too. I was uncomfortable with the brushing and playful teases. I tried to change the topic, bring up things about men. I found out she was engaged but she didn’t want to go into it. After eating and all, we were watching movies, then she just drew close and tried to kiss me.

Like WHOA!!! Calm the fuck down!!! She for rape me o. She kept pushing and pushing. I pushed her away. Told her I don’t roll like that. She kept saying she thought so too till she tried it. Aunty, I said no!!! I was angry and I left. She called me later to apologise. Said she really thought I would go with the flow and she had been hinting me since. I told her I didn’t get any hints. I tried to make it less awkward with chats but she avoided it all. I see now that she was avoiding a mail trail.

These days, my life at work has been a living hell. Nothing I do is good enough. I have received a query twice now on her account. She doesn’t even talk to me again. She goes straight to HR. She said I am difficult, show low interest in learning and are slow. I don’t even know what to do.

Everyone has been asking me what happened. Of course, the normal “you thief her boyfriend?” How do I explain that it is because I said NO to her advances? I tried calling her so we could talk about it and she said she had no idea what I was talking about. I am frustrated. She is really frustrating me. Even with the work from home thing, she still finds time to make my life miserable, BECAUSE SHE CAN!!! I am currently thinking of either changing departments or the job as a whole. I am really good at my job. I do not deserve this.

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